A great ass?
A great ass like this to be exact?
Would you go against the fashion Gods and wear these...
I'm not one to jump on band wagons. I am a wee bit cynical and do not like to wear things I feel less than fashionable especially if they are this hideous! My motto has always been sacrifice comfort for fashion, looking good can sometimes be painful. So when these shoes started showing up everywhere, even on the gorgeous Kim Kardashian, I just shook my head in complete disbelief!
People let me educate you a little here. The only way to get an ass like hers is to A. be born with incredible genes and a super-charged metabolism or B. work for it.
I unfortunately have neither good genes or the desire to work that hard. As a result I have an ass that has been mistaken a time or two for a large bowl of cottage cheese. My ass goes from upper thigh to shoulder blades. My ass could seriously use it's own zip code. When I back up I should have a beeper that warns people so they can avoid injury. Small children {mine and others} have been overheard in public restrooms saying, "you gots a big butt". You know what? I'm an almost 41 year old woman who no longer gives a shit! Instead of trying to eat less and move more I'm going to enroll in an origami class so I can learn how to fold my ass up and make it fit into my one size too small Miss Me jeans. Deal with it!
There I said it. Hello my name is Shawn and I have a big ass. I also think those shoes are ugly. U-G-L-Y you ain't got no alibi they're ugly!
If you happen to be the proud owner of said shoes I will not apologize for my opinion. My intention is not to hurt your feelings I'm just trying to be a blessing and tell you to never wear them in public again. However, if you can prove to me that these shoes actually work I will be more than happy to purchase a pair and wear them proudly in public along with a sign that says "I was wrong, these shoes rock my ass, just like *insert your name here* said they would."
This has been my two cents on fashion, take it for what it's worth. You.Are.Welcome!
Posts
.jpg)
23 comments:
I too am a big bottom gal and I totaly agree those things are ugly!!but I would seriously want my ass to look like Kim's!!
I refuse to wear ugly shoes. I don't care what they do for my ass.
I. Am. Dying.
Dying!
ROFLMAO for real! ("what's so funny Mom?! Mom?! What's so funny?!" is all around me right now.)
The origami ass is what really did me in. Cheese & rice! You are hilarious!
Preach it girl! :) Those shoes probably work as much as my Sensa does! pffff.... it's all just a way to make big bucks off people wanting to lose weight...which is like...everybody!
Great post. Intriguing insight into the female mind.
And I'll bet you thought you had us thinking about asses.
I wouldn't wear them! Fugly! I think her butt is way too big. I, on the other hand, do not have a butt.
U-G-L-Y you don't got no alibi... I looove that, that was hilarious!!! I thought they said that those shoes were dangerous, like people were getting hurt using them... do I even know what I am talking about??? Anyways, I agree with you, they are pretty ugly!
I have a friend who bought the Reebok version of these, you know, the ones that look like "real" sneakers.
She swears by them.
I can't help but flash all the articles discounting these shoes in her face.
What makes you have a great ass and lose weight?? Getting off your ass and walking more, it has nothing to do with the shoes you're wearing! People are so gulliable!
Hey now don't diss my favorite shoes! I live in my Sketcher Shape Ups! I even put them on my feet in my header! They are my favorite!
http://www.skechers.com/style/12340/shape-ups-kinetix-response-s-r-t/sltq
my friend sheila has the ugly shoes and she loves them.
my butt is flat. sooooo flat. flat as board. baby got no booty.
Miss Me jeans - my favorite. I'm a proud owner of 3 pairs - didn't start buying them until after the baby.
Anywhoo - I was a S-U-C-K-A for the Reebok version of these shoes. I will admit, the first 2 weeks I actually felt like they were doing something. Then that feeling disapeared and "hello backpain". No really... It was horrible, so bad I couldn't pick up my own kid for weeks. I stopped wearing them, and then decided to try them again. Again, I greeted back pain with open arms. Finally, I told the hubs I couldn't wear them and I actually put them in the trash (If I kept them I would have kept on talking myself into wearing them and having a chiropractor bill also) That was my lesson on jumping on the "it's in" band wagon. Never.Again.
so glad i found your blog.. you crack me up.. and I did buy those shoes,, they didnt work for me. Maybe I was suppose to actually walk more in them or something.
My hub is a physical therapist which basically means he's a doctor of workout, lol. He'd kill me for saying that! Really though, he is a dr and knows his stuff!!! I asked him if those shoes would really do anything. He assures me they work different muscles and may infact burn more calories but they surely NOT make your bum look like the bums in the commercial. Needless to say I didn't buy them.
Those shoes are incredibly STUPID looking. AND there have been countless articles proving they dont work. People that think shoes will make their booty like kims. HA.
I have a flat butt, so I don't think those shoes would help me. Not sure if I'd wear them, regardless.
Oh my gosh! "I'm going to enroll in an origami class so I can learn how to fold my ass up and make it fit into my one size too small Miss Me jeans" Best sentence ever!
Totally made my day!
I too have a large ass. I'm from a family of large rear ends so I have the wrong kind of genes! I'm not sure if those shoes work but I'm not paying that kind of money for something that ugly unless it's a 100% guarentee!!
OH. MAH. GAH.
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
My ass is HUGE. Bigger than yours, even when I'm "skinny."
It's all in the "jeans." Just barely, but it is! LOL
I bought those shoes. They didn't do anything for my ass. I bought them and I wore them EVERY DAY. I wore them EVERY DAY to work and from work and at work. What? I work at home in front of my computer? Snap. That's why they didn't work.
Origami? Is that like boobigami?? hahahahahahhahaha. You are too funny :)
Right on Sista! You KNOW Kim Kardashian does NOT wear those shoes....can we say "paid endorsement"! She wouldn't be caught dead in them....and neither would I...I don't care how good they are suppose to make you look! Not happening! This is why I love you .....cuz you tell it like it is!!! Miss you!!!
I have to say you are the most hilarious blogger I "follow"...keep up the TMI good work lady! :)
I doubt they work either. You could just walk properly and do what those shoes claim to do.
I once got a two syllable damn for my big ol' booty. It has it's advantages too!
fuck yeah to the wonder twins!
Post a Comment