TTUT ~ February wrap up

Today's Talk To Us Tuesday is a busy one. Busy with a capital B! It's the usual TTUT with the added bonus of covering the Seriously Impulsive swap and Emmy Moms 10 Things To Smile About!


If you're new to TTUT welcome, I'm glad you're here! TTUT is hosted by yours truly and my insane once upon a Captain drinking friend Impulsive Addict {IA}. We host this weekly, rule-free, meme together and have made great friends and have had a lot of laughs in the process. Link up with us, its fun, all the cool kids are doing it, and it's safer than crack so what do you have to loose?


Onto the swap...

We had 32 friends join us for our first swap, a perfect number if you ask me. Thanks everyone for participating, I hope y'all had as much fun as we did! 


My partner was Becca from Every Day Life. We've been blogging together for a while now, she never judges me for not reading and commenting regularly, she's knows I'm busy and doesn't hold it against me. Yep, she's a true bloggy friend which is more than a little awesome! She sent me a great gift, it made me smile so it's on the list below. 

I love linking up with Emmy Mom every month. Her linky is the perfect way to remember the good that has happened since it's way too easy to concentrate on the negative. So in no particular order here are 10 things that made me smile in February.









1. I had a great time shopping for Becca, I hope she likes the things I sent, sending a swap package always makes me a little nervous. The gift she sent me was full of goodness  {Peanut has so enjoyed having a jar of candy to dip her little hands into}! One can never go wrong with a friendship frame, the candles and plaques are perfect for Spring and as soon as my world stops spinning I'll be soaking in a tub full of brown sugar fig yumminess! 

2. Make your own pizza night is perfect for the family night Babe has to work later than he anticipates. "Having it your way" has never tasted so good! 

3. Watching this video of Peanut hitting her very first in the park home run makes me smile every.single.time.I.watch.it! 

5. Getting random texts from Honey makes me smile. This one actually came when she wasn't in school, that was a little bonus! We love Finding Nemo so after I got what it was she was sending I laughed so hard I almost inked myself.

6. Reviewing pictures from family nights and discovering Peanut was a photo bomber makes me smile.  Those girls of mine make a simple things like bowling fun! 

 7. Rogue makes me smile! This boy is the love of my life...after Babe and the girls of course! I was trying to take an afternoon siesta when he came and curled up behind my knees on the couch. Oh how I love that boy of mine! 

8. Getting picture texts of my precious Great-Niece from my nephew definitely makes me smile. Brynn, Aunt Shawn loves you!! 

9. Having Honey recognize that I'm not feeling well, go to the grocery to pick up the needed items for dinner and cook a delicious meal for her family not only makes my face smile but my heart smile too! Have you had grilled pineapple? Soooo crazy good! 

10. Watching Peanut step on home plate. Yep, it should come as no surprise to anyone that watching Peanut play softball makes me smile!

If you participated in our swap make sure to link up your post and please include pictures, we're nosey we want to see! Not a swapper? That's ok, you can still link up with us, just share a funny story, recipe, 10 things that made you smile in February or anything thing else your little heart desires...cuz we're cool like that!

I'm also linking up with Stacy per at Stacy Uncorked for her Bringing Random Back {thought that is people} cuz I'm cool like that! 

I confess...I am not a man

It's been a long time since I've done a confession post and since my good friend IA is pulling out her and JennyKate's old button from when they did a Friday Confessions years ago I thought this would be the perfect time for me to get a few things off of my ever sagging chest. 


I confess the following...


I thought I could fix my broken dryer. I took it all apart, very Tim Allen of me I know, taking pictures along the way with the intention of posting about my victory and proclaiming that I didn't need a penis to do a "man's job". I was not half the man I thought I was and was forced to wave the white flag of humiliating defeat.


I married a pencil pusher who cannot hang a picture without having issues. He was once very handy, kind of a jack of all trades, but all of the time he's spent soaking his fingers in a "man-dish" while getting manicures has made him soft.


Said husband had to buy me a new dryer, nothing fancy I'm holding out for the washer to die so I can get a new set that will fold the load for me once it's dry. He gave hooking it up a noble effort last night but could not get change the venting system to go from a side vent to a back vent. Awww I love him! 


This morning I grabbed my coffee and the power screwdriver and set out to make a little magic in the laundry room. No, I didn't catch the washer on the spin cycle, I fixed the dryer! 


I'm a liar. Not a full on liar just a half liar, that's better right? I did get the vent relocated from the side to the back but that was as far as my mad skills could take me.


After spending 3 hours trying to get the vent to send the lint and heat outside {the idea of a lint filled sauna doesn't sound good to me} I gave up and called a real handy man. That Joker was out here in less than 30 minutes, had it fixed in 10 and only charged me $25. I would have kissed him square on the mouth if he had more than three teeth. Go ahead, call me a judgmental bitch, after the morning I just endured trust me, I can handle it. 


OK, one more thing.....


While I was trying to be all BA I said some not so nice words! Actually, they were so bad a Sailor who is on leave heard me {I'm very loud and apparently my voice traveled nicely through the gaping hole were the vent should have been} and stopped by to tell me that he found my vocabulary offensive. I replied with a friendly, 'yeah well SUCKIT Sailor Boy and unless you're here to fix my dryer get-to-steppin' before I tell Rogue to play tug-o-war with your man bits'!'


I lied again, two more things.....


After my hellacious morning I ate a devils food cupcake slathered with chocolate fudge icing. Damn it was good! 


The guilt got the better of me, I just finished working out like it was my job.


Boy, I feel better! Do you have any confessions? 

Proud? Just a little!

Last weekend was once again full of softball. 


We played six games winning five, leaving the tournament runner-ups! 

Peanut had a great weekend {as did all of the other girls}, was part of an incredible double play, won MVP of the first game and scored her very first legit in the park home run! Two other girls also had straight up home runs, so when I say they all payed well I'm not lying!

Video of the HOME-RUN!

 Love this sign! 

The last game was played in horrible conditions, the wind was ridiculous. That's what I'm saying came between us and winning the whole thing, a Desert Storm type wind. Yep, that's my story and I'm sticking to it! 

Game one MVP! 

She was just a little excited!

Talk To Us Tuesday ~ Take My Advice

YAY for Tuesdays! 


YAY for Tuesdays after a very long week and even longer weekend! 


YAY for Tuesdays with my super freak of a friend IA! Yeah, I said it she's a super freak and she's super freaky! 


Obviously I love Tuesdays, and if you haven't jumped on the Tuesday bandwagon by now it's about freaking time you do! 


Today I'm giving away free advice so sit back and take it all in, you can thank me later! 


If you're going running with your very active and in shape 12 year old daughter do not set off delusional enough to think you'll be able to keep up with her. Hell, don't even start off thinking you'll be able to see her when you drag your old, flabby, out of shape ass back into the house. Oh, and pee first! 


If you're going to mix several pills together because you know you'll know what's what when it's time to take one make sure they look nothing alike. It's not good when you think you're taking 3 Tylenol when in reality you're taking 3 Phendimetrazines! If this happens you may end up in a public bathroom sticking your finger down your throat while wearing your Sunday best to induce vomiting. Hopefully if this does happen you'll be lucky enough to be at church, at least there the other woman in the bathroom will pray for you!  Don't ask me how I know this. 


If you witness another grown woman poop herself have a plan as to what you're going to say to her the next time you see her...because you will see her again! 


When you purchase a new bathing suit you may want to take the crotch liner off and throw it away immediately. If you don't it may end up mixed in with the pile of clean clothes strewn about your room and stuck to a clean hoodie. Then that clean hoodie could possibly end up on your clean body after a shower. There's nothing like looking down to see what could have potentially touched another persons who-ha 8" from your clean face! 

If the doctor prescribes Lunesta for your sleeping issues hide the chocolate. Those Jokers aren't kidding when they say "people have been known to sleep eat". Babe is keeping his fingers crossed that "sleep sex" is not just a cruel joke intended for all of the sex deprived men out there! 


What advice do you have for me? Link it up, obviously I can use all the help I can get! 

I'm a sucky friend!

So you all know my wonderful bloggy friend turned IRL friend Becca right? She hosts a great weekly link up over at R We There Yet Mom called Friday Daydreamin'. This month it's all about love, places you love to be to be exact. I know it's every Friday and yet it seems that every Friday I forget and find myself placed in the "sucky friend" category for not linking up. Me not linking up coupled with the fact that I made a reference to PTA-Soccer Moms had made her not happy with me {boy am I glad I didn't say anything about minivans too!}. I know she still loves me even though I suck because she told me so. She had every right to be mad at me but lucky for me  she's way to sweet to be mad for any length of time...Becca, I puffy heart love you! 


So this week I'm saying that the place that I love to be is in the company of good friends. Those that love me in spite of all of the things I am and am not and do or don't do!  

My "Austin Girls". I CANNOT wait to hang out with these fabulous ladies again in just 74 days! 

Meredith from Greys Anatomy may have her "person"but I have my "people". I would be lost without the love and support of these 5 woman! 

Where's a place you love?

Apparently I'm a freaking Genius!

I am faced daily with things that make me ask WTH? 


I am forced to make a decision as to why seemingly easy tasks are left for me to take care of  repeatedly day in and day out and would love your help.




Is it because...


A. The task is just too hard for them to take on. 


B. They love me so much that they want to keep me busy all day because they know how much I hate having a little down time just for myself. 


C. Perhaps it's just that I do it so much better than them and they're fearful of looking intensely inferior in the light if my supreme knowledge and awesomeness. 


D. Or could it be that they are just lazy, spoiled slugs? 


So you can better understand what it is I'm talking about I have included a picture of one of our bathrooms. What are your thoughts? Are they truly lazy slugs who love me so much that they need to keep me busy? Or are they super special and will require my assistance cutting their meat and wiping their mouths while out on their next date?

TTUT ~ I'm sorry...you just what?

It's Talk To Us Tuesday which just so happens to be my favorite day to blog! It's also the only day I've been blogging lately since my schedule has been so insane, I know I suck but something has to take the back seat when I'm running in a million different directions. 

I really hope this story reads as good as it tells, not that I've told it to anyone of course. If you don't find this ridiculously funny let me know and I'll call you to tell it to you live or send someone to check for a pulse.


Last Wednesday I volunteered at Peanuts school. I worked the "Hawk Store" with 4 other Moms, three of these woman I had never met before. One Mom, the one that was running the show, was a bit eager for me, a bit too "PTA/Soccer Mom" for my taste {no disrespect to my PTA/soccer mom friends! }. She just fit so nicely into that, unfair stereotypical box I couldn't help but set her in it. Sorry.


She left briefly to go "do her time in the band room" but promised to come back to check on us before she left for the day. I was super relieved as I wasn't sure I could continue counting those Hawk Bucks and giving the kids their appropriate item without her assistance. 


Shorty after her return and my repeated reassurance that there was no need for her to give me her cell number just in case I found myself "in a pickle" she set off to leave. Before she could make it all the way around she stopped short, took in a sharp breath and placed her hand on her stomach. I let that go unnoticed because I really didn't care I didn't want to draw attention to her and risk embarrassing her. Within seconds she did the same thing but a little more exaggeration so I took the bait, as did the other Mom, and asked if she was ok. She looked at me with panic in her eyes, like a deer looking head-on into the headlights of an 18 wheeler, shook her head yes and continued her good-bye for another 3-4 seconds until she drew in a sharp breath, let out a mild moan, bent over at the waist and gripped the table. The other Mom and I looked at each other and asked her again if she was ok, she was so dramatic I thought her appendix had just burst. 


Are you ready for it?


Oh please tell me you're ready! 


Nothing's in your mouth, you're not eating are you?


OK


She turned her head to us, all while holding her stomach and leaning over the table and said, and I quote, "I took a laxative and just lost my bowels".


What?


Oh the hell you say!


Did this woman just tell two strangers that she had just shit herself while on the stage of the middle school cafeteria? 


I thought perhaps I had heard her wrong but upon watching her run her hand down the cheek of her ass and into her crack and then back in front of her to see if there was anything on her hand I stood reassured that I did in fact just hear a grown woman, one that I had just met, say "I took a laxative and just lost my bowels"!


I instantly switched to a mouth breather, if I had smelled anything I would have lost it, then proceeded to stand there with the most ridiculous look on my face, totally motionless and speechless. For once I had nothing. Really, what's the proper response to that? Yes, yes you did just loose your bowels and as a matter of fact I think I found them running down the leg of your high waisted, stone-washed jeans. 


She checked for evidence once again with her hand, which sent a wave of nausea through my body, before doing her best to lower the straps of her backpack purse to help shield the prying eyes of the 150 13 year olds that were in the same room as her and made a bee-line for her car.


Maybe it' just me but I would have never....


* Taken a laxative anytime before having to be at my kids school.
* Hung around any longer than a nano second after the first feeling of movement had I gone against my better judgement and taken a laxative.
* Admitted to 2 strangers that I had just shit in my big girl panties! 


Ladies heres just a little piece of friendship advice for ya...


Pooping your pants is no way to make new friends! 


What piece of advice do you have for us today? Link up with me and IA and let us know. 

Weekend recap...I define busy

Please don't misunderstand this post, it is not a post to encourage y'all to tell me how busy and wonderful I am, I already know that! It's more for me to document my complete insanity and inability to say no.


Friday night-  Babe took Peanut to see her beloved University of Florida play softball at her number two college of choice USF. The two of them were in heaven! Honey and I were in our own little piece of heaven watching Channing Tatum in The Vow. It was a good movie and that's all I'll say since I hate movie spoilers! 

Saturday- Winter finally hit for us, we had 2 of our coldest days this weekend, a weekend full of softball. We played 3 games near the water where the temperatures were at least 15 degrees lower there than they were at our house and the winds were close to hurricane winds. We all left frozen through and through with sunburned windburned faces after a long 10 hour day. We stopped for dinner {and a few drinks, literally at the corner} on the way home and I ended up bringing home 2 extra girls. A Xannax on top of my 2 Captain and diets assured I did not hear a peep out of them! 


Sunday- I woke up to make begs and toast for all the girls and did everyones hair {one even got a haircut} flat irons and french braids times 4. Why, because there was more softball of course and they had to look their best. Thankfully this tournament was just around the corner. What was not good was waking to the thermometer that read 35! Another long day in the freezing cold but it was a better day on the field so that was good. Peanut and that number 30 that I've spoke about in the past exchanged more words after that little B kicked off our team name that Peanut wrote on the pitchers mound after we won...THREE times. Peanut told her "you're a good player, too bad you're such a horrible person with absolutely no sportsmanship." There are a few of us placing beats as to when the two of them will take it to a physical level. I'll be honest, that makes my tummy hurt! 


Over the course of the past three days I have hand dipped a 142 pretzel rods in white chocolate, sprinkled them with colored sugar, bagged them and tied them with ribbon for the teachers at Honeys school...I still need to dip 152 more. Babe made homemade red sauce after today's game so I can make 5 huge trays of baked ziti to go with the 80 chicken breasts I'm grilling and cutting up tomorrow. Why? I signed up in the beginning of the year to organize the teachers luncheon for Valentine's Day before I knew how hectic our  schedule was going to be. 


Monday- I'm dipping more pretzels before my 10 am doctors appointment, coming home to fire up the grill, going to decorate the cafeteria then coming home to finish whatever is not done. It see a bowl of cereal for dinner in my families future. 


Tuesday- I'll be at the school by 8:30 to set out all the food so we're ready to serve lunch from 10:30-1:30. Not if that doesn't say That's Amore like the 150 invitations I hand made for then than I don't know what does! 


Wednesday- CANNOT come fast enough. I am doing nothing but staying in my jammies all day long! I'm going to need all the rest I can get to fuel up for the 11 hour field trip with Peanut on Friday and the 2 day tournament almost 2 hours away Saturday and Sunday! 


It can never be said that I'm letting life pass me by...I'm chasing it down as fast as I can! 


On a less stressful note IA and I have gone over each and every one of the applications for our Seriously Impulsive swap and unless one more person says "I'm in" I think we have a pretty good handle on who's swappin' with who. Do you want to be that one person? If so let one of us know ASAP! 


My favorite picture from this weekend....

If you read all of that you're a good friend and have more times on your hands than I do. Wanna share a few hours with me? 

I just can't make this stuff up!

Ladies and gentleman let me just tell you that I had the most unbelievable, unthinkable, and unspeakable {unless you're me than I'm telling everyone} thing happen to me in today. Well, not actually to me, I can honestly say THAT has NEVER happened to me! But it did happen to someone standing next to me and I may need to seek counseling as a result! I will share it with you for next weeks TTUT. Trust me when I say you will not want to miss this one! 


I will tell you this, what happened left me breathing through my mouth, near speechless, pondering "how does one reply to that?" and doing the awkward turtle! 


For those of you that do not know what the awkward turtle is...

Have a fantabulous Thursday my friends!

TTUT ~ Cinnamon Challenge

Welcome to Talk To Us Tuesday, TTUT, the coolest place to be on Tuesdays! Here you can talk to me and my incredible friend IA  about anything your heart desires. The only rule is, have fun!

Last week a friend sent me a YouTube video, you all know how that works, one video leads to another and so on and so on and so on! While on You Tube you know you're inevitably going to come across a Glozell video. I had heard some buzz about the cinnamon challenge but really had no clue what it was all about so when I saw that she had taken the challenge I had to see it. Honestly, it was way over the top, even for Glozell, but it sucked me in along with the other dozen videos I watched of people trying to successfully swallow a teaspoon of cinnamon. Seems easy right?


I'm not all that sure how it came to play but the girls, and one unsuspecting friend, ended up taking the cinnamon challenge last night. That turned into me calling them epic failures, them challenging me to do better, and ending with Honey convincing Babe that she was doing a science experiement about the human tongue and needed his help. Ahhh the things we woman are capable of making men believe...it's pure talent and my girls are prodigies! 


If you can spare 5 minutes and need a laugh then watch the video...I will warn you that the video contains a lot of heaving, laughing, dog barking, and maybe even a little vomit.  

So what are you talking about today? IA and I can't wait to read all about your business so link up, we're waiting for you! 

Don't forget that IA and I are hosting a Seriously Impulsive swap. We have had an overwhelming response so far and will be closing it soon. If you need more information go here and if you want in on the fun be sure to let one of us know today! 

We're swapping not to be confused with swinging!

Yep, that's right just in case you missed the announcement last Tuesday my Impulsive friend IA and I are hosting a swap!  See the cute button over there----> Feel free to post about our swap and include the button if you'd like.


We have already received an "I'm in" email from many of you but we'd love to have more join in on the swingin' swapping' fun. If you would like to participate please send one of us an email or leave a comment and we will get a sign up form to you right away. We will be closing it on the 13th so partners can be announced on the 14th, so don't waste time trying to decide. And don't worry if you've never swapped before we'll walk you through it every step of the way because we're seasoned swingers swappers and super cool like that! 


Unlike our NO RULES TTUT there are a few "guidelines" we need you to follow, so before sending us the "I'm in" email make sure you're ok with the following. 


1. You need to be an active blogger. We want your partner to be able to get to know you and if you don't blog that may prove to be a little difficult.
2. You need to be willing to spend $25-$30 before shipping.
3. You need to be able to mail your package, preferably with a tracking number, no later than February 21st.
4. You need to blog about your experience and link up with us for February 28th's edition of TTUT.


No jumping through hoops here, it's really just that simple! 


What should you send your partner? Well, get to know them a little and send them something that one, you would like to receive yourself and two, something that you believe they would enjoy. For example, if your partner talks about her love for all things Captain she will more than likely not want to receive a bottle of Patron. However if you have those items on hand IA and I will be more than happy to send you our addresses! 


What should you be prepared for? A possible new friendship. Did y'all know that IA and I met through a swap? Well, we did and look at us now, we're very good IRL friends! 


What should you NOT do? Flake out on us and your partner. If you say you're going to do this than do it. Please do not leave your partner waiting for a gift that's not going to show up. That's rude not to mention wrong. If that happens I may or may not call you out! 


Any questions?


Good!


Now go sign up!

Daddy, daughter camping

Last week a few families from Peanuts team came over for dinner. Discussion turned to camping so I left the room and while I was gone an overnight stay at a local campground was planned for four Daddies and their daughters.

One of the Daddies is a seasoned camper, like a male version of Viv, and camps ofter with his sons Boy Scout troop {his son just earned his Eagle Scout badge}, so he was in charge of the logistics. The men met Friday afternoon before the girls were out of school and set up camp. 

Quite an elaborate campsite for a one night stay huh? 

There was a cooking station complete with stackable, stocked cabinets. A dish washing area, which shockingly enough Babe was in charge of.  The fire pit area with a chair for everyone and enough s'more ingredients to send a diabetic into a diabetic coma! One tent for every Dad and one tent for all 5 girls {a little sister joined in on the fun} that was big enough to park an SUV in and still leave room for the girls. 

They lived it up! Dinner was homemade pot roast with carrots and potatoes, fresh cornbread and an apple crumb dessert all made over an open fire. They also had hot dogs to cook over the fire, cupcakes and soda, I cannot believe the girls slept at all! Breakfast was pancakes, bacon, sausage and eggs. I'm telling you that I might consider camping if Mike was going with us and took control. I used to love camping back in the day...believe it or not I have not always been a five-star hotel snob! 

The girls played a little catch and apparently set up a shooting range. I about came unglued when I saw this picture as I have a strict no gun policy, for my girls anyway!  I was told they were only BB guns, I had a nice comparison for my hubby but I will not share it here, it's wasn't very nice! They guns were put away and a mean, literally, game of man-hunt commenced. 

I think she may shoot better with both eyes open!

They came home this afternoon smiley and smelly, a true sign of a great time! 

I'll bet you didn't know....

Do you gamble? Play the slots in Vegas? Play in a local a poker tournament? Go the horse track? What about the upcoming Super Bowl, do you have any money on the line for who the new champion will be?


I think we all bet in some fashion or another, legal or illegal, at the track or via an online sports betting sight. But what most of us may not know is that there's help out there to increase your odds of winning. Who Knew?


For me, I just choose a slot machine that looks pretty, a dealer at the table that looks friendly, a horse who's Jockey is wearing my favorite color or I say to my hubby "I'll bet you **fill in the blank** that you can't change the empty toilet paper every time you use the last square for a full month." For the record, I always win big on that bet! 

Click it, I dare you

There are so many ways to make money while blogging. Some of us are much better at it than other, I have so much to learn it's not even funny! 


I was contacted by a company called Bizzclick and asked to sign up. I snooped around their site a little and decided that it sounded good so I signed up. I figured what do I have to loose. 


There are several different ways to sign up. You can sign up as an advertiser or a publisher, it all depends on what it is you're looking for, in my opinion it's a win-win no matter which side of the coin you're standing on.  


They are a pay by click company who offers advertising on your site and help monetizing your site traffic. With 24/7 customer service and a loyalty program you can't go wrong.


Go check it out and snoop around a bit you may just find that Bizzclick is a perfect match for you and has just what you're looking for for your blog or business website! 

Friday Daydreamin'~ Place I love

I'm linking up with Becca over at R We There Yet Mom today and she wants to see a picture, as in singular, of a place I love. 


Well, you know me, I'm not very good at following the rules, especially when it comes to using just one picture.


We've had a very mild winter so far and as much as I don't like the cold I would like a few days of beautiful snow and maybe even a little skiing. It's been 6 yeas since we took the girls skiing in Utah and I would love to be back there right now. I also wouldn't mind Montana, it was one of the most beautiful places I have ever been! 

Where is a place I love? Anyplace we can all be together! 

Babe skied a lot when he was younger, he was off like he hand't had a 15+ year break!

Honey clicked into her boots and was off.

Peanut picked up skiing as easy as she did walking at 8 months!

This is my favorite picture from the entire vacation! 

Me, well I had never been on skis before so I opted to take the walk of shame and sign up for ski instructions.

Yes, I had to stand in front of this sign while the little kids skied around me taunting me and my lameness! 

 After a couple of hours I chose to grab the camera and a drink and sit in the warm lodge taking pictures!

 I may or may not yelled like a Sailor, popped out of my skis in the middle of the hill and stomped down the hill leaving Babe standing there laughing at me and Mothers scurrying to their children in an attempt to cover their ears. 

Where's a place you love? Go link up with Becca and tell her I sent ya!